Why smile?

I little kid was sitting with his dad in a bus going towards the central part of the city. He was observing the people around him, and saw them in their own world, looking at their hands, looking at their iPods, looking at their books, and gazing into distances.
It was normal for the little kid to see that, but his mind still wondered why so.

The bus stopped to drop people and pick up new people going the same way. The little kid was staring at the people passing by, trying to find a different face, trying to meet another's eye.

A young man stopped at the front of the bus, standing, with his earphones in his ear, just like the others, the little kid thought. But the young man looked different to the usual people he sees, darker skin, hairy face and head, and he was nodding his head to his music, it seemed for the little kid.

The little kid was confused, and even more confused when the young man looked at the little kid and gave a great smile towards him. The little kid turned to his dad and asked "Why is that young man smiling?", the dad didn't understand, and looked towards the young man, who was still smiling, looking outside the bus' windows. "Because he is happy, aren't you happy?" the dad requested with a monotone voice.

The little kid stared at his dad's answer and questioned "I am not smiling, does that mean I am not happy?"

Made out of Two

A little boy once sat on his bed, wondering with curiosity and confusion why wouldn't people understand the religion he follows.

To him, it makes complete sense, to him, he wanted to experience the judgement days and fight the evils, side by side with the holy man. He knew the truth, and the only truth.

That little boy sat in front of screens for hours, getting excited from killing artificial monsters and internet invaders, watching a civilisation being built, dreaming of creating one of his own.

Nothing mattered to him and his friend, but to win this game, and reach a feared level.

Glory came from a button click, a shout comes, the screen shakes.

Lose is a misery, killing his puppet is worse than an uncle dying.

I came back to that little boy's room today, I saw in sadness how his life still exists.

Revived by his friends and family, they still call him to check if he's behaving or not.

I saw his friends fight for a game on a screen, I saw him and shivered, those feelings coming back, playful violence is just a theme.

He saw his family buy without asking, without knowing, doing thinking they are helping, shouting at workers, frustrated from ink on paper.

"Here, read this, you will get 1000 virtues, and this will give you 4000." I shook my head, and said "I prefer to sweat and learn, than receive worthless counted praises."

I saw then that my body was stuck between two cultures, two people. A little boy that needs his family to survive, and a person trying to create change in everything he does.

I am stuck between two cultures, two people, one i grew up with, and one I am coming back to.

Burning Village

I watched, through a moving picture, as a village came closer and closer to my view.

The village was engulfed with orange flames, and I can see it burn slowly from a distance. A sense of hope emerged undetected in me, a hope of escape. A hope of all that was haunting me from that village is gone now, all that weight that I couldn't bare nor face.

I instantly felt a sharp jab of guilt stab into my heart, even though the hope of escape was blissful, I still did love that village and it's people. I do appreciate the nurturing it gave me. I do thank for creating who I am.

But still, I felt I have moved on, forgetting all those deeds, hoping I could repay them through helping the rest of the world. The stab of guilt was not enough to break through my forgetting black heart.

This is my reality. I have left what created and evolved me, and I have had no choice but to do so. To follow my heart, is a hard task to do.

As I approached closer to the burning village, I realised it was indeed alight, but minus the burning. My hope was gone, and I knew I had to face it now.

Face it now, or never in this life.